What more really can be said about 2020 that hasn’t already been said by people with bigger audiences than I have?
A lot, really. Those people don’t have my lived experiences, for one. For two, they don’t know me. How dare they have the audacity to speak for me?
I can’t say I could ever have imagined 2020 taking the path it did. It started out so well. Or mostly well. Honestly, looking back on it, I’m not even sure what I thought I had planned.
The only thing I know I had planned, and which went off without a hitch until the last 48-72 hours, was my TorontOttawa trip in March. Two weeks in Ontario: one in Ottawa to see that city again, visit some J-School profs, eat in the res caf, see people I hadn’t seen in over a decade, and watch Carleton’s men’s basketball team win yet another national title; and one week in Toronto to mostly just not do anything. I did not see as many people as I would have liked, but c’est la vie. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I mean, I’m disappointed, but, reflecting on it now, I was in a bit off a depressed mood most of the time in the T.Dot. I really didn’t feel like doing anything.
That depressive mood may also have been the result of me battling my demons that week. I was fighting them really hard, and a few times came close to losing the battle. I won, as I’ve been doing for the past 19 months now. It’s a struggle. I will not let them defeat me. Or so I keep telling myself.
But that’s beside the point.
It’s all because of the COVID-19 pandemic, but 2020 was just a completely weird year. It doesn’t feel like it’s already over, but it also doesn’t feel like only one year. Time has, by-and-large, lost most of its meaning.
In order to be a good citizen, and because work told me to, I worked from home for most of the year. I tried to, anyway. When you’re a quasi-journalist, there’s only so much you can effectively do from home. Journalisming is kind of a hands-on, in-person job. At least it is for the type I do. I guess city hall or provincial affairs reporters are still able to work via phone and livestream.
Of course, working from home is challenging when your apartment building is GETTING FUCKING JACKHAMMERED EIGHT HOURS A DAY FOR SIX MONTHS STRAIGHT. Yeah, FUCK YOU Centurion. Who was the mentally deficient jizz stain who thought JACKHAMMERING A BUILDING EIGHT HOURS A DAY FOR SIX MONTHS STRAIGHT was a good idea during a pandemic when people are being asked to stay home? I’m debating moving when my lease is up. I don’t want to suffer through this again—it is continuing in 2021 BECAUSE OF FUCKING COURSE IT IS—but I also don’t want to move again. Decisions. Decisions.
I think the jackhammering is what made this year feel so long. It was inescapable. Sure, I could go for walks; but I don’t want to walk for eight hours a day, plus I still had work to do (when I had work to do). I could have gone into the office, but then I’m putting myself and others at risk. In the end, I went back to the office.
I will never forgive Centurion and the useless, broken condoms it calls a management team. Centurion also blocked me on the Twitter. I guess they don’t like it when people call them out on their bullshit.
On the work front, there was some actual progress and success. Nearly a full year after Postmedia—my former employer that is a right-wing propaganda mill—pulled the plug on publishing my current employer’s newspaper—thank god and good riddance—we finally launched the new website version. It was much more work than it should have been, but that’s government bureaucracy for you. Since the launch, it’s been so far so good. Not as many hits as I’d like, and not from the the right places, but it hasn’t even been up for six months. It’s still a tiny little bebe.
Personally 2020 was interesting. Had a root canal. Not a terrible experience, but it was generally unpleasant. You try having your mouth propped open for 60+ minutes straight. I’m going in for a crown on the root-canalled in early 2021. We’ll see how that goes. I also need some other teeth looked at – I’ve been having trouble with one (or more) for a few months. I’d have gone in sooner, but my dental benefits were wiped out by the root canal. Not the best course of action, but the tooth/teeth wasn’t/weren’t unbearable. Which means I will have waited too long and now I’m going to lose it/them because of course I will.
COVID-19 ruined vacation plans I had, which wasn’t all bad. I missed a wedding, but the reception has been pushed back to 2022. Disappointed to miss the wedding, but I didn’t have to sort out a date. Now I have more time. Oh; who am I kidding? I won’t manage to secure a date. I haven’t had a date to a wedding since never. What makes me think I’ll have one for the upcoming reception? I know who I would ask, if I’m not seeing anyone at the RSVP deadline. But should I just ask her anyway? The reception is in less than 500 days. Decisions. Decisions.
I guess we could move on to some New Year Resolutions.
Seeing as we’re still in the middle of a pandemic, and will be for the foreseeable future, I can’t say I have too many realistic resolutions. One I want to have is to be much more diligent in going to the gym. Pandemic life has not been kind to my waistline. So maybe one resolution will be to be as active as possible while being safe. Whatever that means. Another is to read more. I’m not going to say read two books a month, but 20 books in the year sounds better. That accounts for lulls or books that are really long *cough* ‘It’ *cough* or hard to get into. Seeing as I’ll be working from home, that sounds like a realistic resolution.
I don’t really have anything else.
Happy New Year, I guess. May she be a damn sight better than the old one.